Keep Going All Night With Playboy’s Own Energy Drink


Playboy is the new Disney Krusty the Clown – they’ll put their logo on pretty much anything in the hopes of making a buck. The latest? Playboy Energy Drinks.

I’m sure there’s a link the marketing department over at the Playboy mansion will be working on between the drink and sex with hot women. Perhaps they’ll try and convince people it’s like a liquid Viagra. Maybe they’ll make an ad where Hugh acts all tired, with dozens of bunnies hanging off him, wanting his shrivelled old body to embrace their silicon-filled ones in an orgy of wrinkles and implants.  And he’ll be like, “No, I’m too tired, and too old,” and then one of them will bring him one of these energy drinks, and then they’ll fade to black and when they fade back up, all the women are satisfied and Hugh’s smiling. Or dead. Does it matter?

According to the press release:

“Playboy and Play Beverages LLC are thrilled to announce the launch of the ultra-sexy, incredibly invigorating Playboy Energy Drink. With subtle notes of fruit and vanilla, this proprietary formula contains ginseng root, guarana extract and damiana leaf, ingredients that are believed to stimulate energy levels. Available in two varieties, regular and sugar-free, Playboy Energy is now available in the Boston area and will roll out to Miami, Las Vegas and Los Angeles this March.”

I wonder how many people will buy it for its “fruit and vanilla” flavour, as opposed to the brief notion that they’re actually going to score like Mr Hefner by drinking it?