I generally don’t find myself browsing Bring A Trailer unless something truly exceptional crosses my feed, and I don’t think anything is more exceptional than this 1977 Dodge Tradesman B200 that has been decorated to near perfection and could easily double as a sex van for those so inclined. And once you see the interior, you will probably be so inclined.
The specs on this vehicle are fine, but I highly doubt you’re buying it for 360 cubic inch V8 engine or three-speed automatic transmission. No — you’re buying it for its bright yellow body kit and luxuriously outfitted interior, the latter of which you can just smell after a quick glance at a photo.
I’m not sure where to begin, so we’re starting with the exterior before we open the doors and crawl into the den of iniquity.
This absolute art piece of a van features a rear spoiler for extra sexy downforce, a sexy orange LED underglow, not one but two sunroofs, side-pipes, wheel arch flares, and oval-shaped sex windows positioned directly alongside the rear seats… or sex bed. I’m not sure which it is.
Now let’s open up the barn doors and crawl into that lush backseat. Can I interest you in a chilled glass of wine from the under-seat wine storage slots? How about some fancy cheeses from the fridge? Or would you prefer to flick on the flat screen television to a fireplace channel, letting the warm crackle and pop of charring wood echoing through the custom sound system set the mood?
If that doesn’t set your loins alight, then perhaps the recurring surfing banana motif will do the trick. You can find said banana chilling underneath a lighted glass panel in the floor and stitched onto the headrests. For some extra chill vibes, look no further than the surfer with his board that replaces the boring old gear shifter. This isn’t just a van, folks. It’s an experience.
And you’ll also be paying an experiential price. The car last sold at the Mecum auction in Las Vegas for $US17,000 (A$23,838), and it’s currently sitting over $US30,000 (A$42,068) with just under two hours remaining on the clock. But can you put a price on a portable sex bed portal? Can you really?