Shhhhh. Is it afternoon already? Oh man, you were supposed to meet your friends for brunch, or biking, or something that starts with B. Forget that, your friends have. Instead, grab your favourite blankie and head over to the couch. Let’s just chill and watch a few movies to ride out that Australia Day hangover you’re sporting.
Let’s break the rest of the day’s movie watching safari into three parts:
Chill Movies or How I stopped Worrying and Learned to Love Silence
First let’s ease into the day. Nice quiet movies without explosions. The last thing your head wants is Michael Bay blowing shit up. Too loud, too LOUD!
Wall•E:
The movie is nice and quiet during the first half. No loud explosions. No one yelling about how the cops are after them. Just a robot cleaning up Earth. The film is filled with a few chuckles and is stunning to look at. More sound and dialogue is added as the movie progresses making this a the perfect hangover movie. Plus, it’s an outstanding film.
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The Princess Bride:
You’ve seen this movie about a 100 times. Let it hold you in it’s familiar embrace as you move in and out of consciousness on the couch. You know all the dialogue, so you can turn the volume down nice and low so it doesn’t make your skull explode every time Vizzini says, “Inconceivable.”
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2001:
The only “art” film on this list. This is a must see for any nerd, and it’s soothing soundtrack will keep your brain from spilling out of your ears. Just try not to fall asleep and wake up during Dave’s journey through the Monolith. That might freak you out.
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Laughter 2: This Time, It’s Personal:
Next, let’s liven up the mood with a few comedies. Maybe order a pizza. Cheese, dough, laughs, the day’s coming along nicely.
Friday:
Ice Cube and Chris Tucker star in a hilarious film about relaxing at home and smoking weed. Probably what you’ll be doing towards the middle of the day. One liners and hilarious adventures with the neighbourhood bully and drug dealers should get you sitting up on the couch.
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The Big Lebowski:
The movie that inspired a generation to sit around the house in robes and tell each other that the, “the Dude abides.” The Coen bothers’ cult classic is a cautionary tale of what could happen if you never snapped out of your post-New Year’s Eve funk. No one wants to lose a rug.
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Clerks:
Kevin Smith’s first, and possibly, best movie. Two guys at work talking about asinine topics. It’s pretty much everyone’s life at around age 19. The black and white film won’t sting your eyes with blinding colours. And, if you fall asleep a few times, it won’t affect your understanding of the plot.
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The Hangover:
This movie is about hangovers. You have a hangover. Oh my god, it’s synchronicity. Actually this movie is in here because I didn’t feel like reading comments about how it SHOULD be in here. You win, are you happy? Yeah, I bet you are. Actually the movie is hilarious and Mike Tyson sings.
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Get Pumped:
Finally, it’s time to rally. You’ve taken a shower. You’re feeling human again. Someone texted you about heading out to dinner. Let’s get pumped with some action.
Red Dawn:
Admit it. As a teenager you kinda wanted the Russians to invade so you could live in the woods and battle the Communist bastards. Alas, Russia imploded and your dreams of wearing a beret while screaming, “Wolverines!” would never come to pass. At least you can stand on your couch and yell it.
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Iron Man:
Robert Downey Jr as Iron Man. It’s perfect casting. More fun and action packed than any of the dark Batman movies and less preachy than those X-men films. Watch Iron Man blow stuff up while enjoying his untold riches.
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Die Hard:
The action movie. Bruce Willis is a John McClane a NYPD officer taking on a group of terrorists/criminals. While the LAPD sits helpless, McClane takes on criminals with a five-o’clock shadow and a wife beater. If this movie doesn’t get you up and out the door, you’re either dead, or you really need to tone it down next year. Yippie-ki-yay, motherfucker!
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