I have a confession: I’m very bad at keeping a routine when brushing my teeth. How I’ve got this far in life, I’ll never know, but it’s something that has been made abundantly clear these last few weeks as I’ve been reviewing the Colgate Pulse Series 2 electric toothbrush.
Before I get into it, I need to say I’m actually disgusted in myself. The Colgate Pulse Series 2 didn’t set out to give me an existential crisis, yet it has, and that’s a reflection on me, not the toothbrush, nor Colgate. What’s on Colgate, however, is how awful this thing feels on the roof of my mouth.
I have so many thoughts, good, great, bad, ugly – here’s what I think of the Colgate Pulse Series 2 electric toothbrush.
Colgate Pulse Series 2
The Colgate Pulse Series 2 electric toothbrush was released in May and will cost you $130, plus $30 for four replacement heads (three different head types, but only one type per box). The toothbrush comes with two types of heads, each head should last you about three months – I only bought a replacement box so my partner could try it out (more on that later, though). It’s not an overly expensive endeavour, but it’s definitely more than the $2 Coles brand pack of two ‘multi-angle’ toothbrushes.
The Deep Clean Brush Head promises to remove five times more plaque vs a manual brush (this is the brush head I spent the most time with), the Whitening Brush Head promises whiter teeth in a week, and the Sensitive Brush Head is marketed as being tough on plaque and gentle on gums with soft, tapered bristles.
The Colgate Pulse Series 2 electric toothbrush promises a lot. Three modes of brushing, a timer to let you know every 30 seconds to move on to the next quarter of your mouth, a pressure sensor, 14-day battery life, a travel case, Bluetooth, and an app that gamifies the whole darn thing.
I just think it’s a little on the ugly side, plus it’s so bloody big.
Beauty is pain
Before the Colgate Pulse Series 2, I used an Oral-B electric toothbrush – I think it’s this one, it is fairly old. The first thing I noticed when using the Pulse Series 2 was that it moved in a completely different way to the Oral-B one – it pulsed, almost as if it was in the name. Instead of a circular clean, the Pulse was vibrating super fast in the one position.
Not to be overdramatic, but the vibration was too much and I started moaning so bad that my partner rushed into the bathroom to see if I was OK. I had toothpaste pouring out my mouth and I was hovering over the sink shrieking in pain. I hate being tickled, it causes a visceral response in my body, one that registers as pain and something akin to the feeling of violation. I cannot understate how awful this felt when the brush touched the roof of my mouth – not even fully, just on the part of the gums that touches my upper teeth. I finished the clean, one I did alongside a tutorial (more on that in a sec), and I had tears streaming down my face. But, my teeth were near perfect. They had never felt and looked so clean.
This is something I got a little bit used to – I learned where not to stick the brush and I also learned to not follow the tutorial (still getting to this, I promise) and I would clean behind my upper teeth last. I also sort of gamed the system and found myself cheating to convince the app I had cleaned a particular area when I really hadn’t.
I bought a pack of replacement heads and asked my partner to give it a go (he also uses an Oral-B toothbrush, but a newer one that has a few more bells and whistles than mine). I came running into the bathroom to watch him when I realised what he was doing – the first thing he said, wincing like someone had just punched him in the gut, “it sucks”. With a mouthful of foam, he added, “This is the worst” and once he had finished, “I’m never using this again”. He did use it again, the following morning. His second clean was worse than his first, according to the app. He told me this is because he just wanted it over and done with. But, he also said his teeth have never felt cleaner, and he’s a model student, cleaning his teeth twice a day, religiously.
In addition to the far too intense vibration, the Colgate Pulse Series 2 electric toothbrush is also really big. A few times I had to physically lift out my lip to put the brush onto my upper teeth. You get used to this pretty quickly, however.
Don’t forget your toothbrush
The Colgate Pulse Series 2 offers far more than the electric toothbrushes of yesteryear. This thing has an app, one with a lot of info and things to do. If you ask me, Colgate has nailed the gamification of cleaning your teeth. 12-year-old me would have loved the shit out of this thing. On more than one occasion, I found myself getting out of bed to clean my teeth before sleeping because I didn’t want to upset the app (I also didn’t want to come across as a grub to Gizmodo Australia readers, but here I am, admitting I am a grub who cleans their teeth once a day).
The app gives you a summary of your clean, showing you a model of your mouth and a bit of info on where you missed, what your pressure was, how long it took you to clean, and it logs all of this in a diary. You can earn points for doing something as pointless as answering a bit of teeth trivia or following a tutorial.
My first day was the only time I followed the tutorial – it was helpful, but it wasn’t the easiest cleaning your teeth and looking down at your phone. But, you don’t need to use the tutorial and the app syncs to the Colgate Pulse Series 2 and adds data from ‘offline cleaning’, which is fabulous. The app also reminds you to turn the tap off, I think I earned a point for this. ‘Smile points’ can be redeemed for offers ranging from in-app digital content, for purchases of and to discounts for Colgate Products with third-party partners. You can redeem 277 points for an Amazon voucher that’ll let you save $5 on Colgate products. At the time of writing, I have 223 points and have been using it for a fortnight (remember, I’ve been very bad with brushing only once a day on most days and I also gave up on the trivia stuff and you also get points for signing up, etc).
Obviously, the best part of the app is the insights part. You can swivel around the render of your mouth and see where you should pay more attention to.
With all of this, it’s easy to forget this is a toothbrush.
Overall, it’s fine
I’m still confused over why I, an adult, need a toothbrush with a MAC address, but as I have already admitted, the gamification of the whole thing held me accountable to actually cleaning my teeth, even on days when I didn’t leave the apartment. It’s got a lot of stuff I won’t use, but I would have loved to have used this as a kid, and hell, using this as a kid may have prevented me from being so bad at cleaning my teeth as an adult.
The response I had the first day to the vibration is not something that has continued, I’ve gotten used to it, and as I said, worked out my own brushing routine that suits me more. The two-minute timer with 30-second alerts is great, as it lets me know when to move on. My teeth have never been so clean and although I’m not comfortable with posting a before and 14 days later pic on here, I’m definitely a lot less self-conscious about how my teeth look. Usually, companies pick up the gear they send us to review, I’m doubtful something that has my spit all over it will be collected, so if Colgate leaves the Pulse Series 2 electric toothbrush with me, you best believe I’ll continue using it and throw the Oral-B out. I probably won’t collect any Smile points actively, but I’ll definitely revel in the fortnight battery life (I’ve not charged it after first charge), and the feeling of just how smooth my teeth feel after every brush. Maybe it’ll force me to be less of a grub.
Where to buy the Colgate Pulse Series 2 electric toothbrush
Amazon $129 | Big W $130 | currently on sale from Coles for $65